When Sober is Boring.

Here you are.

You've arrived in your new life.

You've gone through rehab, or you just got out of prison, or maybe you just recently decided to quit using substances/addictive behaviours on your own.

However you have managed to arrive here, you have, and that's really hard work that I congratulate you on!

But... now what?

Your old schedule was an uncomfortable, yet somehow very comfortable, one. You knew how the evenings would play out, who you might be with, what you would be doing. So what are you meant to do with your time now?

This boredom is a common conundrum and can be one of the triggers for relapse. It is therefore very important to figure out what it is that you want.

If you've done any therapy or been through any kind of program to help you with managing your addiction, you should understand a bit about how your brain has been functioning. So I won't get into that here. What we need to focus on in the after-care is the part regarding your future. You are a human being who is filled with values, desires, needs, wants, and limitless potential. And if you can find out what those are to you, your time suddenly becomes valuable and fulfilling; even exciting!

I invite you to consider these questions:

What makes me smile/feel happy/feel peace?

When was the last time I made space for that activity in my life?

What would it feel like to consciously create more time for that?

What would be the first step towards incorporating more of that activity into my life?

How can I hold myself accountable to doing things that are good for me?

These seem like simple concepts and questions, but we don't often allow ourselves to really spend time considering them. But if you can start adding a little bit of joy back into your life, you will have taken the first step towards figuring out what it is that you really want.

If you can figure out what it is that you want, you'll replace that boredom with excitement and purpose.

If you can find your compass, it will lead you home.